I’ve been debating on whether or not I wanted to make this post, but here I am so here goes nothing.
Four years ago today I was diagnosed with cystic fibrosis. I had been in the hospital for a couple weeks at that point with a bad case of pancreatitis that wouldn’t go away. My doctor decided they needed to try and figure out what the cause of it was, so he wanted to start ruling things out. The first thing he did was order me a sweat test. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
So there I was four years ago, sitting in a room in what I would soon become all too familiar—Farley 4 which is the clinic for pulmonary and respiratory diseases aka CF clinic for me now. I had two bands on my arms collecting sweat thanks to a chemical given to before. The test took about an hour so they put on Ratatouille for me to watch. I even remember the nurse saying something along the lines of: “oh you won’t have this, I can tell you when it’s done it’ll be negative in 5 seconds.” (Jokes on her!)
It’s funny how when you’re in the moment you have no idea that it could be a life-changing event. All I was thinking about was getting back to my beautiful big, @cathunter_ who was visiting me that day with her mama. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
When I met back up with my mom and our incredible visitors of the day we were about to go back out to the garden when we were stopped at the elevator. A social worker had been on the floor looking for me. I’ll never forget the words she said: “are you Catya Kurban? The doctors need to see you right away!” Some people just have a way with words...
Mom then wheeled me to my room that was already filled with doctors (gotta love teaching hospitals) who then proceeded to tell me that I had cystic fibrosis. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I guess the reason I wanted to post about this day is because we never know what the future will hold. As cliché as that sounds—it’s true! Take that day as an example, I was watching Ratatouille one minute and the next I had a diagnosis. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I had a bad habit of wondering about the “what ifs”. What if i never got diagnosed? What if i had been diagnosed earlier? It took me a while to realize that there’s nothing I can do to change the past [continued in comments]